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escape from carvoeiro.
escape from carvoeiro.
i am looking for escape cmtees members to assist us digging the escape tunnel from under cassys bar (sssh dont tell them) we expect to come out near the lagoa junction.
any digging materials we will deposit on the beach from secret pockets in our bermuda shorts...well the beach was a bit small...needed enlarging i aways thought
three shifts will work....women 6.30 until 12.00 when they can stop to make dinner...men 12.00 until 2...(or until dinner ready) and the women back from 3 until 7 ...when they can stop to make tea...well i cant be fairer than that.
if anyone wants the film rights ..sorry i have sold em already...bruce willis is taking my part by the way
i have lined up demi moore to play maddi..and sharon stone as ellie
cowboy is to played by larry hagman...biffa ...michael douglas.
other parts are up for grabs
when we have escaped from cell block c...we will have an annual reunionby the cake counter at intermache
any digging materials we will deposit on the beach from secret pockets in our bermuda shorts...well the beach was a bit small...needed enlarging i aways thought
three shifts will work....women 6.30 until 12.00 when they can stop to make dinner...men 12.00 until 2...(or until dinner ready) and the women back from 3 until 7 ...when they can stop to make tea...well i cant be fairer than that.
if anyone wants the film rights ..sorry i have sold em already...bruce willis is taking my part by the way
i have lined up demi moore to play maddi..and sharon stone as ellie
cowboy is to played by larry hagman...biffa ...michael douglas.
other parts are up for grabs
when we have escaped from cell block c...we will have an annual reunionby the cake counter at intermache
-
Ellie
escape!
Escape Martin 
You may be--but my understanding was that most of us here were trying to get out there
Howe could you possibly want to get away from all that wine --women --and S----- Song
Sharon Stone for me eh
Well--Im teribbly flattered--but can I have a say in how that young woman
"crosses" her legs please?
Lets have a little "finesse " in the proceedings--after all--I wouldnt want to tarnish my good reputation here now would I
Wonder how Mads feels about Demi Moore--mind you--doesnt she have a man "half "her age now in tow
and would she and Brucie get on --on set?
When does filming begin? and how do Coop & Biffa feel--got a feeling Coop might have preferred Clint
but I could be wrong!
Biffa played by Michael Douglas? Well it would get him a little closer to Catherine Zeta Jones
You may be--but my understanding was that most of us here were trying to get out there
Howe could you possibly want to get away from all that wine --women --and S----- Song
Sharon Stone for me eh
Well--Im teribbly flattered--but can I have a say in how that young woman
"crosses" her legs please?
Lets have a little "finesse " in the proceedings--after all--I wouldnt want to tarnish my good reputation here now would I
Wonder how Mads feels about Demi Moore--mind you--doesnt she have a man "half "her age now in tow
and would she and Brucie get on --on set?
When does filming begin? and how do Coop & Biffa feel--got a feeling Coop might have preferred Clint
but I could be wrong!Biffa played by Michael Douglas? Well it would get him a little closer to Catherine Zeta Jones
well well well....thats gratitude..you line up the biggest stars.and no thanks given 
ok lets start with cowboy..no need to call your agents...your man said you were working just to gain experience.
as for maddi...well miss jolie can t do it..but if you could come into my office and sit on my couch....hem hem..i might be able to do some other casting...er...how about meryl streep.
as for miss ellie...im crossing my legs and hoping that if sharon cant make it then hows about godie hawn..shes got blonde hair.
as for the others...well they havent even replied..so looks like they wont be getting any hoscars this year.
we will of course be digging up carvoeiro for the underground scenes...if any wants some spare top soil let us know.
i hope that none of you will want paid until the premiere in estombar at zes caf on feb 30th,
bruce
ok lets start with cowboy..no need to call your agents...your man said you were working just to gain experience.
as for maddi...well miss jolie can t do it..but if you could come into my office and sit on my couch....hem hem..i might be able to do some other casting...er...how about meryl streep.
as for miss ellie...im crossing my legs and hoping that if sharon cant make it then hows about godie hawn..shes got blonde hair.
as for the others...well they havent even replied..so looks like they wont be getting any hoscars this year.
we will of course be digging up carvoeiro for the underground scenes...if any wants some spare top soil let us know.
i hope that none of you will want paid until the premiere in estombar at zes caf on feb 30th,
bruce
-
Ellie
golden girl
Yes!
I do think I would prefer "Goldie"--and shes not just a pretty face but good actress and comedienne---and I'd "kill" for that neat figure( I must lay off the icecream!)--so ok ---Ill go along with that
Maddi--my sons acted alongside "Angelina Jolie" --and can assure you --shes "some babe"(as he delicately puts it)
Well -Cowboy seems willing --but you might have to up the stakes in the pay department for our Coop-he dont come cheap
No word from Biffa yet---maybe hes been snapped up already
I do think I would prefer "Goldie"--and shes not just a pretty face but good actress and comedienne---and I'd "kill" for that neat figure( I must lay off the icecream!)--so ok ---Ill go along with that
Maddi--my sons acted alongside "Angelina Jolie" --and can assure you --shes "some babe"(as he delicately puts it)
Well -Cowboy seems willing --but you might have to up the stakes in the pay department for our Coop-he dont come cheap
No word from Biffa yet---maybe hes been snapped up already
-
Ellie
naughty but nice!
Bit unfair that--annual reunion by cake counter at Intermarche!
All those gorgeous pastries--another of my weaknesses--oh dear--bring on "Goldie"
All those gorgeous pastries--another of my weaknesses--oh dear--bring on "Goldie"
-
Jamdodger
chunky
Just came across this one,and had to say that Goldie Hawn would be a poor casting for Ellie,from what I observed when seeing her at Colombo's on seveal occasions she is far to well stacked to be played by such a lean lady. I baggsy being her agent and letting her play herself.
With regards to making Carvoiero beach bigger,the cliffs are now so doddgy that if enough of you stamp in unison a fair chunk will fall both left and right.
With regards to making Carvoiero beach bigger,the cliffs are now so doddgy that if enough of you stamp in unison a fair chunk will fall both left and right.
for any wavering wendies or williams who havent signed their contracts...wait for it..........................................................
.............wait................................yes i have arranged for the Mona Lisa folks to do the onsite film location catering....with the baked beans and greasy bacon butties we will be sonn running thru the film
now sign here...........................
and here...................................
you see ...quite painless.
now let us begin
working title "ESCAPE FROM CARVOEIRO"
scene. under cassys bar...steam rising..little light
we see two small figures in background darkness
toiling with pickaxes
"MADDI" (demi)
ack shucks..i dont want be doing this
"ELLIE" (goldie)
me neither...but we got get outa here
cut to "CASSIES BAR" interior
we see cowboy eating his breakfast and reading the
paper.
COWBOY
Hurry up you too..get your backs into it
.....oh no...oh no..its not.ahhhhhhhhhhhhh
to be continued.................................
.............wait................................yes i have arranged for the Mona Lisa folks to do the onsite film location catering....with the baked beans and greasy bacon butties we will be sonn running thru the film
now sign here...........................
and here...................................
you see ...quite painless.
now let us begin
working title "ESCAPE FROM CARVOEIRO"
scene. under cassys bar...steam rising..little light
we see two small figures in background darkness
toiling with pickaxes
"MADDI" (demi)
ack shucks..i dont want be doing this
"ELLIE" (goldie)
me neither...but we got get outa here
cut to "CASSIES BAR" interior
we see cowboy eating his breakfast and reading the
paper.
COWBOY
Hurry up you too..get your backs into it
.....oh no...oh no..its not.ahhhhhhhhhhhhh
to be continued.................................
-
Goldie/I mean Ellie
madness
How can you resist it "Whitecoat"?
Come on in and join the fun
Thanks for the offer Jam--but Im not so sure about the "stacked" and chunky bit---- I still dream of being tall/willowy like Goldie--sigh ---mm--mm----
Cowboy!--How could you play such a cruel b-------and I always saw you as
the cool gent Cooper I know I dig for a living--but really--this is too much
Martin--just what is it me and "Demi" are escaping from
Come on in and join the fun
Thanks for the offer Jam--but Im not so sure about the "stacked" and chunky bit---- I still dream of being tall/willowy like Goldie--sigh ---mm--mm----
Cowboy!--How could you play such a cruel b-------and I always saw you as
the cool gent Cooper
I know I dig for a living--but really--this is too much Martin--just what is it me and "Demi" are escaping from
Just gessing here Ellie but perhaps we are escaping from men who make us dig tunnels!
Have to say still not entirely happy with the casting (Meryl Streep was worse, she must be old enough to be my mum) and definately not happy with the catering but hopefully Cassy's will be keeping me in black russians so it won't be long before I am beyond caring.
I have also got issues with the script, I mean whats my motivation for "ack shucks".
Maddi
Have to say still not entirely happy with the casting (Meryl Streep was worse, she must be old enough to be my mum) and definately not happy with the catering but hopefully Cassy's will be keeping me in black russians so it won't be long before I am beyond caring.
I have also got issues with the script, I mean whats my motivation for "ack shucks".
Maddi
-
Ellie
Mads -quite agree about Meryl--much too "Mumsy" an image for you cherie( My dear--did you catch her at this years Oscars- that dress--Quelle horreur )--I think M will have to offer more to get Jolie--or at least someone more glam/voluptuous
Just re-read "Jams" remarks--well-stacked/and chunky(on subject)--blimey--makes me sound like haystack
As for the script----well "bucks" rhymes with "shucks"--and we'll certainly need big ones ---if we're to go along with this--escapism
Is there a "way out of this" before "MrWhitecoat" runs us to ground with those jackets----oh I dont know though----that might be fun too mm
)--I think M will have to offer more to get Jolie--or at least someone more glam/voluptuous Just re-read "Jams" remarks--well-stacked/and chunky(on subject)--blimey--makes me sound like haystack
As for the script----well "bucks" rhymes with "shucks"--and we'll certainly need big ones ---if we're to go along with this--escapism
Is there a "way out of this" before "MrWhitecoat" runs us to ground with those jackets----oh I dont know though----that might be fun too mm
now ms maddi....trouble with motivation...well er i dunno how to help..i thought mona lisa grub would have been enough and my svengali charm
anyway, the background to escape from carvoeiro is similar to that other film escape from l.a. and escape from newyork where mr snake pilsner has to escape.
anyway, some background......the year is 2020..the president in airdrone one has just crashed into smiliers bar in cvo...no damage reported...to the bar that is....cvo is now a fortified golf course resort inhabited by a mad race of gofers who are impotent and lost their balls..the whole place survives on air drops of hamburgers....(french fries after lunch). club sandwiches for tee by the way..sometimes though they find the tee off.
your task ms maddi (demi) and missy ellie (goldie) ..should you wish to accept it... is to dig a tunnel from cvo to assist the president escape....whilst digging you will meet oppostion but with the assistence of cowboy you may succeed..the whole world now run by men in white coats and eating jam await the outcome of your mission
may the golf course be with you
anyway, the background to escape from carvoeiro is similar to that other film escape from l.a. and escape from newyork where mr snake pilsner has to escape.
anyway, some background......the year is 2020..the president in airdrone one has just crashed into smiliers bar in cvo...no damage reported...to the bar that is....cvo is now a fortified golf course resort inhabited by a mad race of gofers who are impotent and lost their balls..the whole place survives on air drops of hamburgers....(french fries after lunch). club sandwiches for tee by the way..sometimes though they find the tee off.
your task ms maddi (demi) and missy ellie (goldie) ..should you wish to accept it... is to dig a tunnel from cvo to assist the president escape....whilst digging you will meet oppostion but with the assistence of cowboy you may succeed..the whole world now run by men in white coats and eating jam await the outcome of your mission
may the golf course be with you
Ok got my motivation now . . . not for the line "ack shucks" but definately for digging a tunnel to escape !!!!cvo is now a fortified golf course resort
Now back to some of the casting issues I have - if Ellie and I have to be helped by a man (far fetched in my view but hey I am guessing this is a fantasy), does it have to be Larry Hagman, can't I have Brad Pitt or Heath Ledger?
Martin, your svengali powers can only extend so far and I want a gorgeous, young stud muffin, please, pretty please.