As it is still too warm here for bed, I was looking through the jokes section and came across one called 'learning chinese in 5 minutes' and this took me back to my early days in optics when a super new brand of sunglasses from Japan were introduced under the Fu Kyu label.
When anyone came in for sunspecs and asked what we recommended the receptionist replied " F--- Y--" ---- for some reason they did not sell very well !!
Anyone else had any similar linguistic problems ?

A puzzling encounter recorded by a traveller in Asia. (This is best read aloud).

RS: Morny. Ruin sorbees.
G: Sorry, I thought I dialed room-service.

RS: Rye. Ruin sorbees. Morny! Jewish to odor sunteen?
G: Uh, yes, I'd like some bacon and eggs.

RS: Ow july den?
G: What?

RS: Ow july den - fry, boy, pooch?
G: Oh, the eggs! How do I like 'em? Scrambled please.

RS: Ow july dee baychem - crease?
G: Crisp will be fine.

RS: Hokay. An san toes?
G: What?

RS: San toes. July san toes?
G: I don't think so.

RS: No? Judo one toes?
G: I feel really bad about this,but I don't know what
'judo one toes' means.

RS: Toes! Toes! Why jew don juan toes? Ow bow singlish
mopping we bother?
G: English muffin! I've got it! You were saying 'Toast.'
Fine. Yes, an English muffin will be fine.

RS: We bother?
G: No, just put the bother on the side.

RS: Wad?
G: I mean butter - just put it on the side.

RS: Copy?
G: Sorry?

RS: Copy...tea...mill?
G: Yes. Coffee please, and that's all.

RS: One minnie. Ass ruin torino fee, strangle ache
crease baychem, tossy singlish mopping we bother
and honey sigh, and copy...rye??
G: Whatever you say.

RS: Tendjewberrymud.
G: You're welcome.

Surely this is just the thing that Grumpy Guest mentioned in his earlier message in "New Section please". Keep the jokes in the "Jokes" section and keep the "General" section of the forum for the benefit of CVO and Portugal items PLEASE.
It great to be able to swap stories and hints/tips for the area, but the sports, jokes, puzzles (that recent post should be elsewhere) and perhaps even virus items that quickly change subject deserve to be demoted.
Keep CVO.com forum just that!

Couldn't agree more Valerie, and everybody see Grump Guest's "New Section please" mention of this too.

Can you do anything about this G & ktee? Seems to be a sensible reply with valid point(s).

Whilst I agree with the sentiments of the previous 3 replies,my subject was an attempt to get the forum away from the subject of football,football,football.
I am sure we have all had problems with such things as 'massa' being both pasta and cement and confused with 'maca 'meaning apple.
By all means have separate sections for sport and jokes, but surely this does not mean there is no room for HUMOUR in the general section !!!!!

Ah for jaysus sake can ye not keep the hairsplitting for the hair dressers..roy great post....many thanks ...wonderfull start to a monday morning. don,t be put off by the other crap.

Im with you Roy4eyes..Gerry..on this one...
Surely Valerie/Carol/Brent..if youve been using this place long enough...you know that topics often go off at a tangent..will divert ( humour/fun will come in..oh how terrible )..but they are/can be brought back on topic.....
I think this makes it more fun(agree Roy)...if you start going down the road of a 'keep it all in a straight line'....and too much separation/type of censuring....then you will 'lose it' altogether on here.
Valerie..your mention of the 'virus' topic..I take it you mean the one I put on 'Infected'....I happened to get a lot of help with this one..and Im sure others have too!
and if you are that cheesed off with things why not start your own topic?
Dont moan about things and be negative..get on with it and make it better..but for gods sake DONT take the fun/humour and diversity out of this place...it will become a dead duck!...if that happens,I for one will be out of here...quickly :!
p.s. Nice one SHOWWWY!
SOS !! Maddi...Pammie...Susandawn...et al..hurry on back darlings we need you .....desperately!!!

I think we agree with most people on this one - I think primarily what Grumpy and the others were saying is that the sport is/was getting too much on this site. After all we can't even turn the tv on these days without Wimbledon / football and test cricket (such as it is) disrupting our viewing. Thankfully the garden looks great after a few weeks of special care....!
Hope all is well in CVO - visiting next week. GB

Ellie I so agree with you Gerry and Roy4eyes, this is an open forum and although I can see that nearly ever post lately has been about sport, when all you get on the tv,radio and in the papers is the build up to the football, then Wimbledon, and now soon the Olympics, that the general public will have things to say about it, I suppose a seperate 'page' for sport might be a good idea, I also think that just keeping this forum for serious questions and tips would be very boring, we do have a sense of humour you know! Also it is so easy to go off subject when everyone gets going, as you say Ellie this would be a dead duck

Sorry for my part in this brouhaha.

I wondered myself about the placement of this item. Then concluded there is always a place for a good laugh.

And one ponders about the necessity of hiving off humor really. I guess it saves time for those out to save it.

Seems some others agree.

Anyway, point taken.

Anywhoose enough of this crap can anybody tell me when the 2004 Euro footy thingy starts please, and do you think Spain will have things done in time

Oh ho ho CM...naughty boy..careful now..'they'( ) will be putting you somewhere 'seperate' ..a little forum all on your own
I was just thinking......there was a time ..not so long ago on here..when 'Golf' infiltrated every topic (or nearly)..but there didnt seem to be too much protest then
Well..only from a few of us
But please please ..dont lets get bogged down in 'too' serious matters..and if we do have good interesting topics& info...allow the humour/fun/wit...jokes to flow in.......
this place is nothing without it....
anyway 'po' faces drive me up the bl---y wall...........ellie

Any one seen blobby?

Boy